Small Things

I am going to be narcist today, this time I’m going to write about myself. Well at least about bits of my life. I’ve left Melbourne for about a month now, and not until yesterday had I feel homesick. Well I don’t really know what to call it, it’s like I wasn’t born there and I don’t even have any family in Melbourne, so technically it wasn’t home. But on the other hand I’ve spent quite a number of years there, and more cruicially those years were my adolescent years. Those were the years I’ve experience the first of everything, and hence like what my friend said (who happens to be in the same boat) Melbourne is the place where all our firsts happened. The first clubbing, the first smoke (though I’ve grown out of it), the first boyfriend, the first heartbreak, the first car, the first lecture, the first laundry, gosh the list will go on and on. And because of this I call Melbourne my home, though adopted.
Yesterday, I put my Van Morrison record, and straightaway everything floods back, and I was so desperately missing my old life I think I could cry. It was a summer afternoon in Lucy’s pad when I first heard the CD. I can still smell it, a perfect lazy Sunday afternoon in her shoebox flat. We were nibbling on spinach dip, crackers, and grapes on the veranda. Lucy’s plants were still really new and tiny flowers in assorted pinks. The street was rather sleepy except for array of summer people in their tanks, thongs, and sunnies, heading for some cool cafes in Lygon. And we were just lounging peeping at people walking, gossiping. And of course this brought me to another Sunday afternoon in my place with Lucy and Verli. We’ve gotten some wine from a nice cheap place in south Melbourne. The guy said it had a twinge of lanolin taste, and being me I cannot resist not to have it. And you know what, the girls almost kill me for it because believe me anything that’s meant for your skins will not go with wine. Luckily Lucy brought some leftover reds. And we had candles that afternoon, which I put in a glass vase along with some flowers & leaves picked from my veranda. We must have stayed there for hours chatting and listening to tunes from again Van Mor, Frankie, and Elvis (Lucy & Verli couldn’t stand him though). We had grapes, garlic dip and mini toast which we picked up in Chadstone, and I grilled some Lebanese bread.
I miss my friends, but most of all I miss my flat and all the small things. I miss my Barbie room which I painted myself with Yosa and Marg. I still remember the day we picked up the paints, it was in Bunning, sort of like warehouse for all the building stuff far away in some hick suburb. And golly we felt we’ve been thrown in another planet. There she was, Yosa with her chic Gucci sunnies and Sass & Bide miniskirt among giant guys in dirty overalls. And the worst thing was we didn’t have a clue what we have to get let alone where to get them. The first shop attendant wasn’t very helpful close to rude in fact, probably thinking that we were just some bimbos. After we pick the color swatch I want, we then browse the shelves to get the paint can. We must have browse them tens of time and not seeing anything close to pink. Then a nice shop guy who must have seen us wandering around blankly came up to us offering help. And only then we found out that one just have to pick any can, bring it to the counter along with the swatch and they’ll mix it for you. God talk about ignorant. Anyhow in the end I have a lovely room with pinks and whites stripes. The pink came up much brighter than we expected, and that’s how my room got called Barbie room.
Anyhow enough reminiscence for now, else I’ll be miserable again. What I want to say is always savor the small things because by Jove those are the things you’re going to remember most.

Evil lurks in Idleness

I've been feeling terrible the past few days. Last night really topped it off, i've finally managed to get some sleep amids the coughing and sneezing, only to wake up a few hours after with horrible nagging cough and extremely sore throat. The worse thing was that since my nose were runny i had to breath from my mouth butt at the same time my throat was very sore, so really the experience was truly hellish. I went down to get some water, then my mum wakes up hearing my coughing. She then tends to me, making me teas, giving me some antibiotics, she then even tucks me back to bed.

This is a far cry from the last time i was sick. I was still living alone in Melbourne at the time, and the flu was no less meaner. I remember gasping for some air, and feeling awfully thirsty. I had to crawl from my bed to the kitchen and boils some water. I then had to rummage the medicine drawer trying to read the label without my glasses. I finally given up the hot water because the kettle seems to take forever and i was too drowsy and weak to wait any longer. I crawl back to bed desperately missing home and my mum that i almost cry. Really illness do takes people to their most vunerable. I spent the rest of the night in agony, gasping for some air, and not able to stir at all nor to sleep.

By no means i was lonely when i was living alone. Friends swarms through my door all the time, and the outings are endless. But when you are sick and confined to bed then the aloneness (is there such word???) becomes loneliness. My friends do come over during the day, bringing me soups and everything. However the nights are truly nightmarish, because when you are sick there's no telling when you're going to wake up to a headache stupor or nagging cough and sore throat. And when it happens the last thing you want is to be alone. You'd want to be taken care of, you'd want someone to soothe you, or at the very least you'd want to know that if the worst thing happen there will be someone to takes you to hospital. Actually that was one of the thing i was most afraid of when i was living alone, to get really really sick and die at home because nobody was there to get some help.

Kalo Cewe Cewe Nonton Bokep

Kalo cewe cewe nonton bokep :

1. Pasti memperhatikan hal hal yang sebetulnya tidak relevan seperti sepatu pemain yang se badebokan lembong, bed cover murahan ala motel motel highway, atau bikini wax bervariasi.

2. Kagum pada kelenturan badan pemain apalagi kalo dalam posisi posisi aneh yang memerlukan kefexibelan seorang pesenam... (pikir pikir enak juga kalo punya jodoh pesenam yah)

3. Pasti jadi ketakutan sendiri kalo si pemain cowo melakukan hal hal kinky di kuil si pemain cewe, sampe sampe bisa gemeteran layaknya nonton filmya stephen king.

4. Bawaannya parno terus kalo ada suara suara dari luar ruangan walaupun kamar sudah dikunci dan di luar gak ada siapa siapa ......kecuali orang tua.

5. Suka cepet bosen kalo si pemain lama lama dalam satu posisi, yang mengakibatkan fast foward adalah function essential dalam menonton bokep.

6. Suka engga konsen dan hampir selalu di sambi makan, atau ngegosip seperti layaknya kalo lagi nonton teletubbies, kadang kadang keasikan gosipnya sampe tau tau bokepnya udah selese

7. Sering memperhatikan hal hal kedokteran seperti anatomi pemain, keaslian body parts pemain yang kalo di judge dari bentukannya pasti ada turut campur dokter bedah dan mak erot

8. Bertujuan untuk menambah khazanah sebagai bekal nanti jadi istri orang, walaupun dalam hal ini gua juga gak gitu yakin apakah bakal berguna. Karena ada teman nonton yang waktu melakukan sama suaminya, di tanya suaminya " Sayang, kamu kebanyakan nonton bokep ya?"

9. Suka mengomentari plot cerita yang tidak plausible, bahkan kadang kadang non existent.

10. Kalo ditanya suka engga mau ngaku kalo dah pernah nonton bokep. Eh tapi kalo gua beneran loh gak pernahnya.....

Percakapan Dua Anjing

Chiki: " Kenapa tho nduk, pagi pagi udah nyanyi nyanyi kaya orang menang undian semilyar aja"

Elsa: " Ah mba'e bisa ajah" " Eh tapi mba'e, mba'e kemaren denger engga bapak bilang dia mau cariin aku jodoh, wahh seneng ya mba'e akhirnya aku bisa ketemu jantan gagah."
(dengan muka bersemu semu)

Chiki: " Hus, kamu nih yang engga engga ajah, jadi anjing betina tuh ojo ngono yang biasa biasa saja. Jodoh tuh engga usah dicari, itu adalah rejeki. Dulu juga mbakyu mu ini engga dicariin jodoh sama bapak, eh tapi kawin juga sama mas Baron."
( dengan gaya seperti ibu ibu sok tau)

Elsa: " Ah itu kan dulu , waktu di sini banyak temennya. Kalo sekarang kan kita cuman berdua. Semua sudah pada dibawa pergi. Sekaranng kan aku pagi sama mba'e, siang sama mba'e, sore sama mba'e, kapan mau dapet jodoh." “ Lagian aku bosen mba, mosok setiaaappp hari di rumah terus Cuma tidur, makan, tidur, makan” “ Apa salah aku seneng, meh pergi, lalu bakal ketemu anjing lain, salah tho mba’e?”
(dengan nada meninggi)

Chiki: “ Ya nda gitu nduk, aku seneng kok kalo kamu wes dapet jodoh, apalagi nanti kalo kamu punya anak.” “Punya anak itu seneng loh nduk, walaupun capai rasanya tuh sepertinya tugas kamu sebagai anjing betina sudah terpenuhi.” “Apalagi ya kalo habis melahirkan kamu pasti diberi makan banyak sama ibu, dikasi susu, telor, ati sapi, engga Cuma makanan sisa seperti biasanya.”

Elsa: “Iya yah mba’, aku ya pengen punya anak biar nanti disayang bapak, ibu dikasi makan banyak.”

Chiki: “Iya memang, tapi…. Itu semua hanya sementara nduk, waktu anak anakmu sudah agak besar pasti semua di ambil bapak, dijual ke orang orang…”
(dengan suara bergetar dan mata menerawang sambil menitikan air mata)

What If

What If

What if the world doesn't turn?
Then the time would stop and i would be with you

What if we didn't meet?
Then i would not know how to love

What if i didn't love you as much?
Then i would not be crying my eyes out

What if i've never had you?
Then i would not know the pain of losing you

What if i didn't lost you?
Then i may not appreciate you as much

Joystick

Ever wonder where there word joystick originate from???
Well the first time i came across the word was when i was about 6 yearsold
in the age of Atari and Apple computers. Wanting to attract us to computer my father bought us an apple computer and some computer games. One of them was a war game, the kind you have to shoot the people. I suppose it was like Time Crisis except that everything was squarish and green.

Now we can actually used the keyboard to play it. You just press some key control to move right or left and you can press the space bar to shoot. It was okay at first, untill one day my dad came home with a weird device. Again it was squarish, i guess everything about computer at that time were squarish, but this device got a round thingy sticking up from the base, and it has buttons at the bottom. My father told us the device was called a JOYSTICK. And you know what it was a real joy to use. Suddenly i become unbeatable, and the device manage to glued me in front of computer for hours. The game was suddenly easy peasy.

I suppose that is what joystick means, a device to ease your task and adding some Joy to it. But the word itself, why do they name it that? Is it because it has stick in it and it actually gives joy to anyone who use it, well at least it gives moderate help?
Or is it more sinister than that? Recently as a joke my friend send a picture of a naked man playing playstation with a joystick, it was a private joke mind you. But i noticed the resemblence of the man's thingo and his joystick. Could it be that's where the word came from?
After all let's face it like it's machine counterpart it does gives joy to anyone who used it. Not that i know of course... ;)

Heartache

This morning when i was doing my loo reading i came across a story about a girl who was away on holiday with her family.

Now she was madly in love with her girlfriend who unfortunately was also away in her own holiday miles apart.
Flannery, that was her name, missed Anne so desperately that she feels she's in her own world. And regretfully she cannot invite anyone to her little world, because being a closet lesbian Flannery cannot talk about her girlfriend to anyone in the house. This drives her mad because being away from Anne the only thing that she can thinks of and wants to talk of is of course her darling Anne. In fact that was what her little world consist of, Anne or at least thoughts of Anne.

She then wrote that her heart actually ache from loving Anne and being away from her. The ache was physical as if an organ was missing from her hollow chest. She had always thought that heartache was only superflous word poets use to describe love. But in fact she finds out that heart ache is literally an ache in your heart. Its like a head ache except it's in your chest rather than your head.

Amid my own ache namely stomachache, quite common while someone is in her loo, i came to realise that Flannery was right.
I too with my share of romance had experience the ache that she was experiencing. It feels like your heart slackens a bit, and not pumping quite as it should be. It's like there's something pressing your chest, and sometimes it makes me cry because it becomes unbearably painful. Now i never knew that it's heartache nor that it had anything to do with love. I didn't even knew what heartache is. I always thought love as feeling and not something that can be translated to bodily function or disfucntion in this matter. but apparently it can. When you fall in love it's not only your feelings quite often referred as your heart, but your body also responds.

So people there's nothing superflous about Heart Ache, it's just an ache like any other ache. Except that i don't know the remedy for it....

IQ....

gua lagi mikir mungkin gak sih orang mengalami penurunan IQ karena idle lama lama?
Sebetulnya mungkin aja gak sih soalnya bayangin ajah kalo misalnya orang abis koma trus bangun kan badannya jadi slack trus dia harus belajar jalan lagi , ngelatih otot otot, bahkan mungkin motoric sensenya harus dibangun dari pertama lagi...
an apa bedanya sama otak yah?
mungkin kalo otak lama gak dipake terus dia juga jadi kaya badan kalo lagi koma...lama lama jadi comatose....
waduh mungkin gak ya otak gua udah mulai menumpul gara gara gua kelamaan nganggur...
buset buset takut juga niyyy kalo gua udah susah susah sekolah lama lama demi mengembangkan otak gua yang cuman secuil ini dan buatan cina ini (inget yah barang barang cina menang di harga kalah di kualitas) terus selama gua nganggur ini isinya menguap semua...

lah gua jadi rugi dunks sekolah lama lama dulu... apalagi bonyok gua yang udah susye susye bayarin gua sekolah.
tapi sebetulnya bonyok gua mestinya tau dunk kalo dari dulu gua gak pernah ranking berarti menyekolahkan gua adalah high risk investation... emang susye yah jadi orang tua harus mengambil illogical decisions kalo udah menyangkut anak..

This is my first posting...
Am not quite sure what to write since don't really have anything to say except that
am experiencing total extreme boredom
Have thought about takin a prolonged nap but decides against it since am not really keen to stay up all night mainly because got nothing to do except watching crappy telly show